Senior Night

I normally wouldn't post multimedia from another website, but its College Gameday week here in Tucson. A relatively unknown program that ESPN has is the Road Trip, and this week they stopped in Tucson, most notably at one of my favorite hangouts, Frog & Firkin. I just felt that everyone needed to see this to recognize that my university is better than yours. To quote Channing Frye, "U of A is the greatest school in the history of schools."

http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=4674185

Because the game this week is senior night, and it is my (2nd) senior year, I will be giving you a rundown of the things that I will miss the most about this place. In my half decade in Tucson, I have enjoyed many great times, with many great people, in a lot of different places.

Here's my list, in no particular order (they are all great):

Frog & Firkin: We all know and love it as Frog. Great food, a ton of my bros work there, and you can always count on a ton of Arizona's most 'talented' female students being there. They have a solid selection of beers, a great location to people watch, and honestly, with the weather that we have in AZ having an outdoor hangout is a must.

Sorority Recruitment: I don't know about you, but a big selling point in U of A's favor when I was applying was the aforementioned talent. A great deal of this talent belongs to the bigger sororities here on campus. Recruitment happens before classes actually start, which wasn't always the case, but I think that things work better this way. One thing that is critical to the Arizona experience is the school spirit. This ties directly into sororities as I think the culmination of recruitment gets everyone (bros and bras both) real jacked for the semester to start. Running of the Bulls is awesome. It gives you a chance to scout potential stars of the rookie class. What happens is that the girls pick up there bids to find who they were matched up with, and traditionally (not always the case) they run to their new sorority and all of their new best friends. This ends a period during which sorostitutes, and rushees (is that even a word) are not allowed to go out and have any fun at all, which is probably the only bad thing about sorority recruitment. To me, it is the perfect kickoff to school at the greatest university there is.

Football Games: For a kid who goes to a basketball school, I enjoy football a little too much. However, for students, game day is pretty tough to top. Generally tailgates start hours before kickoff, and while I won't go into details (your welcome mom and dad) these are awesome. And honestly, who doesn't like the girls in those Zona Zoo shirts? If your a guy and you don't, then stop reading this, never talk to me again, and join the clergy right now. Then there's the actual game. While I don't love the seating arrangement, in fact a word comes to mind that rhymes with 'mustard duck", our student section is pretty tough to beat. In fact, its nationally recognized as one of the top student sections in the country. All of these things combined with my favorite sport add up to some of my favorite days on campus.

After the Game: This is something that a a lot of people have no idea about, which is a damn shame. Following home games, the band, cheerleaders, and a couple other spirit groups perform out in front of heritage hill, near the admin building. Playing "Bear Down" and a host of other songs, the performance ends with a ringing of the USS Arizona bell, which is both haunting and badass at the same time. To me, this experience showcases the pageantry that makes college football unique, and at least in my opinion, the greatest sport in the world.

Oceanography: Everyone takes this class. I failed the first exam, and still got over 100 percent in the class. Taking 'Ocean' is a great opportunity to hang out with your bros on campus, people watch (generally there are hundreds of students in the class, including athletes and sorostitutes alike) and take a step back to middle school. This is the only class I have taken in college where drawing is a big part of your grade. Look, if your GPA sucks, register for this mother and you'll get the gist of what I'm talking about.

Dirtbags: A lot of people will give me a tough time for this. Let me start by saying that generally, there are a lot of tools, chads, or whatever hanging out at this bar. That part I don't like, and for many people, to an extent understandably so, that is is a deal breaker. However, there is no place in Tucson that really embodies what a classic college bar should like Fratbags does. The bathrooms are revolting. The music sucks. In fact, Neil Diamond might be the newest artist they have. But look at the walls. All types of classic U of A moments captured in photos. License plates that are promoting Arizona or degrading ASU. Plus, honestly, the talent I keep talking about. If you are a red-blooded male, you cannot at least admire the clientele at this place. Maybe even talk to one or two of them. Also, and I hate to namedrop (OK that's a blatant lie) but many members of the staff here tend to know who my friends and I are, and even what we order. A lot can be said for having a place like this to call your own. Regardless, this place reminds me of the Hollywood idea of college, for better or worse. If nothing else, it is an interesting atmosphere to delve into for a couple hours a week.

Homecoming/Spring Fling: I lump these two together because they are pretty similar. Both are week long celebrations of a weekend event. Both have nothing really do to with said event. The reason that I love these weeks are the week of parties that precede said event. I have never physically been to the Spring Fling Carnival. But honestly, 5 nights of theme parties, hydration, and meeting girls is pretty awesome. It also just so happens, probably due to how much Jesus loves me, that I never have any homework due during these weeks, so I can eschew many of the responsibilities that I normally would have in favor of a good time. The added bonus is the weekend for homecoming, which includes a football game, and many of your friends who have moved on returning to relive the glory days.

Date Dashes: You you get a date (although this is not always a set-in-stone requirement at some sororities), a stupid costume (read previous note) and ride a bus to some undisclosed location where there is a dance floor and a crappy bar, as well as lots of microwaved snacks to enjoy. I know that wasn't the most endearing description, but you have to live these to understand them. Honestly, every chance I get to wear a crappy blazer, or a drawn on mustache, or a Penny Hardaway college throwback (only 14 bucks and better than any jersey ANYONE else has) I take it. Notice the theme here. Look, if you don't get it, come to U of A for the girls. It will make you regret ever wanting to go someplace like Kansas or Indiana or Holy Cross. Trust me here.

Greek Life: Having 100 best friends. Having a location on campus where you can do whatever you want. Instant access to any club or resource on campus. 100 best friends. Rolling deep. Spring Fling. Date Dashes. Homecoming. Late Nights. Bars. Bags. Beta. Battlestar Galactica.(KIDDING) Potential New Members. Dude, rush. It is the best decision you will ever make and you will not regret one second of it. I can't emphasize enough how awesome it is to join an organization along the lines of mine. The past 4 years have been incredible for me, and if you want the college experience, rush. We are not paying for friends. In fact, we are generally paying so that our friends are insured in case they are hurt. I can't explain this via words on the Internet, at least enough to give the Greek community justice. All I can say is, find a house where you fit, get a bid, and join it.

Honorable Mention:
Basketball games
the ILC
D2L
the Rec Center
Lecture Halls
Labor Day Vegas Trip (a later column when I get more famous than I already am)
The U of A mall.
Highland Breakfast Burritos
4th Ave
Sorority Kitchens on weekends

I am terrified of this game. Not only of the machine that is the Oregon Ducks, but because it is my last home game as an undergrad. The next time the 'Cats play in Arizona Stadium, I will be wearing a tie. Enjoy every second that you get at this school, don't take anybody or anything for granted. This is the greatest place on earth. On the Real, I'm going to miss this place, and everyone here. Come back soon for more Real Talk

Cal Week

Sup dudes. This is a pretty crazy time to be an Arizona fan, isn't it. Ranked in football, with a chance (albeit an outside shot) at the Rose Bowl? Makes me pretty happy that I 'chose to stick around' for another year. Perhaps most important this season is that we toppled the Washington State Cougars. This win ensured bowl eligibility, but that was NOT why it was critical. What it prevented was. If Arizona lost, I had promised to camp outside sunny Jim Livengood's office until he and Mike Stoops were unemployed. Thankfully, and I never thought I'd say this about that dainty AD of ours, they still have a job.

I am pretty bummed that our football team lost out on Jordon James. Honestly, I am quite bitter. He was a 'silent commit' to UCLA for months. What this means is that Jordon wasted hours of our coaches time, and our athletic departments money, and was essentially abusing the recruiting process. I hope he enjoys the Neuheisel regime in Los Angeles. I don't see that team getting any better, and James, who in my opinion is a cornerstone type talent, will be running for his life every play. Great choice kid. Just ask Aundre Dean. Or Cris Ramirez. Or Derrick Coleman. Or Milton Knox. Look all of them up, and you will get an idea of how life is for running backs in the Rose Bowl in the post Maurice Drew era.

Lets all hope and (if you believe) pray for Jahvid Best's recovery. I absolutely despise the city of Berkley, the university located there, and its athletic program. Not to mention everything that has come out of it, perhaps most notably 'free love', creepy, smelly hippies, and DeSean Jackson. Jahvid is the lone exception. He is a standup human being from nearby Vallejo, otherwise known as the birthplace of Jeff Gordon, and by all accounts doesn't seem to be the weirdo that Cal breeds. And honestly, even if he was, that injury looked horrific. I wouldn't wish that fall on Rudy Carpenter, or the U Dub referees, or any Oregon Duck. Keep your head up #4, your a champion whether you play again or not.

On a slightly related note, anyone with a soft stomach should probably avoid tommorow's broadcast. I have no doubt that we will see the injury about 60 times throughout the course of the game. Jahvid's fall, and his injury, is one of the most revolting images I have ever seen, a rare video that makes my stomach turn when I watch it. Makes me all the more thankful that he can communicate and move his extremeties, but that doesn't mean I need to see it ever again.

Don't get me started on LeGarrette Blount. Typical Mike Bellotti and Oregon garbage up there, and I can't believe that no one is calling Chip Kelly out for going back on his word. Im done talking about this, but I will close with this: My money is on Mr. Blount making things hard on himself again, maybe not now, but somewhere down the road.

This weeks game has massive ramifications for the Arizona program. A win, and the 'Cats remain in first place in the league. A loss, and who knows what happens this season. Arizona is a markedly better team than the Cal Bears, especially with no Best. However, there is one massive thing in favor of USSR state. Going back 30 games, no team not called Oregon State or USC has marched onto Patrice Lumumba field and claimed a victory. Stoops coached Arizona teams have had a ton of trouble there, including several shutouts, and a sloppy, uninspired loss two years ago. If talent wins games, and I hope if does, Arizona wins easily. However, a riled up home crowd will be in store, and you just never know what to expect from a team that has gone through what Cal has the past 7 days emotionally. This game is one that I am marking as a 'toss up'.

Keep reading, bros and bras. Sunday I will be writing a lot of papers, and I plan on writing something for you as well. We will be taking a step away from college football and instead Real Talk will discuss other aspects of our lives, the contents of which haven't been decided. Stay tuned.